Like many I know, Disney’s Frozen has captured the heart of our home. The songs are playing constantly. The toys and dress up clothes are an obsession.
As I watched the movie and listen to the music, I am struck by all the therapeutic lessons it holds. It is extremely relatable for many people, which strikes a cord and connection that is deeper than just “liking the movie”.
So I am starting a several blog series that may help you understand what might be connecting you so much to the characters and story line and pointing out the awesome life lessons it brings up. You might begin to understand what “moves” you so much about this movie.
Princess Anna’s Abandonment Issues
The younger sister Anna has strong abandonment issues in the movie Frozen.
As a little girl she not only becomes an orphan when her parents are lost at sea, but her sister, Elsa, cuts her off and shuts her out (due to her own issues which I’ll cover next week).
At age 5, Anna’s grieving begins when she sings, “Do you want to build a snow man?” through the door to her sister:
“I never see you anymore
Come out the door
It’s like you’ve gone away
We used to be best buddies
And now we’re not
I wish you would tell me why!”
Later as Anna ages, she keeps trying to connect with her sister and is met with constant rejection from Elsa.
After loosing her parents at age 15, Anna sings,
“Elsa, please I know you’re in there
People are asking where you’ve been
They say, “have courage” and I’m trying to
I’m right out here for you
Just let me in
We only have each other
It’s just you and me
What are we gonna do?”
How many of you remember the feeling of being shut out as a kid? Maybe it wasn’t from a family member, but it was a chronic sense of loneliness that overwhelmed you. Or maybe it was not finding a friend group where you “fit”. Maybe you felt invisible to others.
This can create an emptiness that many seek to fill with any or everything that might numb the pain of the rejection- healthy or unhealthy.
We see Anna trying to fill the void when she sings the song, “For the first time in forever” when the castle gates are open for a celebration for the first time in years:
“Cause for the first time in forever
I won’t be alone….
For the first time in forever
There’ll be magic, there’ll be fun!
For the first time in forever
I could be noticed by someone…
And I know it is totally crazy
To dream I’d find romance…
But for the first time in forever
At least I’ve got a chance!”
Do you hear Anna’s longing for to be seen and loved by someone? ANYONE? This is what creates her blindness when she meets Prince Hans and INSTANTLY falls for him. So much so that they get engaged after a few hours of knowing each other.
Anna is unable to understand real healthy love due to her abandonment issues. She desires to have connection and love so badly that she will settle for anything that feels good to ease the pain of her loneliness.
This is such a common struggle for those with abandonment issues. Love is a fantasy to get swept away in. It is romanticized.
When you have been rejected chronically, your self worth is diminished. You feel dismissed and disposable. When you don’t see yourself as having much value, you don’t see the need to be treated by others with respect and true healthy love.
So you may allow yourself to get into emotionally harmful scenarios without seeing them as potentially dangerous. Your assessment abilities might be minimal because your heart is screaming for connection which quiets the internal red flags that might come up when in harms way.
So when watching Frozen, if you notice a strong connection to Anna, it may be because of your connection to her abandonment issues. You might relate to her pain and her searching for the cure to ease it.
If so, it might be good to process your abandonment issues through reading more about them, or talking to a professional to help. These issues can control your life in a very deep way if not healed from.
Check in next week as I will be diving into Princess Elsa’s issues!