Yes thanksgiving is over and it’s time to start thinking about Christmas shopping. Finding the perfect gift is on everyone’s mind. Have you ever thought to give loving Christmas gifts? This year, try to give gifts that say ‘I love you’ to your friends and family by matching it with their love language.

Ever heard of the 5 love languages by Gary Chapman? This book helps people understand that we have different ways of feeling loved. The 5 main love languages people fall into are: Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, and Physical touch. It’s not limited to adults- kids have a love language too. Knowing the love language of people you love is a great way to make sure your love is being communicated effectively.

Here’s a short video from Chapman’s website that gives you a picture of the 5 love languages being acted out.


Do you know the love language of your spouse, children, or friends? If so, you may want to give gifts that say ‘I love you’ that match with their love language. As you will see, many of these don’t require money or wrapping!

Here are some ideas to give loving Christmas gifts:

Words of Affirmation

If someone you love has the love language of words of affirmation, here are some ideas:

  • Write a card saying all the things you’ve loved about the year with them
  • Write a poem for them and frame it
  • If you’re creative, write a song and sing it on Christmas morning.
  • Be sure to say ‘thank you’ for all the ways he/she made the day special

Acts of Service

If your loved one’s love language is acts of service, you may want to try one of these:

  • Do a chore all day on Christmas that he or she would usually do. Cook a meal, do the dishes, make the bed, pick up all the wrapping paper trash, etc.
  • Give a coupon book with things you will do for them

Quality Time

This one has a variety of easy ideas you can do:

  • Buy him/her a movie and spend time watching it
  • Get a game everyone can play
  • Take a walk or drive around together through the neighborhood to look at Christmas lights
  • Put a date package together. Get a gift card or two and write a note asking if you can go on a date together.
  • Buy a calendar and mark a date night for each month with a gift card attached to each month

Receiving Gifts

Well this one might seem easy this time of year. But one thing to keep in mind is that you find a gift that shows you know your loved one. Your gift should reflect that you are listening, watching, and you were thinking of them when you bought it. A random gift doesn’t mean the same. Think of something that could make their life easier. Think of one of his/her favorites. What is something they would never buy for themselves, but they have always wanted? These are good places to start when it comes to someone with a love language of receiving gifts.

Physical Touch

If your loved one has a primary love language of physical touch, be sure to do these simple things too that don’t have to include sex:

  • Sit by each other on the couch. Touching when you’re near is a good thing!
  • If there is snow, go outside together and play. Be sure to tackle each other too!
  • Give a foot rub or back massage
  • Cuddle on the couch
  • Wrestling
  • Play with his/her hair
  • Scratch your loved ones back

There are endless ideas, but hopefully these will get you brainstorming to give gifts that match with your loved one’s love language this Christmas. Happy gift giving!